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Mullet Pic Fix

pg. 9

Dungeons and Dragmull

A true mullet from the role playing genre, this mull is usually seen with Mullanonymous* planning strategies for Friday night events. He's a loner by day, but hangs with his dragmull buddies by night. He would routinely draw characters with the physique of Conan The Barabarimull (Yes, Conan did have a mullet in the film), wielding longswords and double-edged axes.

This mull can also be found at the local Hobby Shop or model convention, where he buys pewter Dungeons and Dragons figures. He re-creates World War II battle scenes with Revell kits and Tamiya paints & gets a slight "buzz" off the fumes as he works closely imagining himself amongst the burnt out buildings. He's just a real mullet wishing he was where the action was.

*Mullanonymous can be found in Pic Fix 2.

written by Mulletjunky Hewissa  

Deviant Mull


Lodging foreign objects into the orifices of small animals, shoplifting, ANYTHING to do with fire, defacing property(arcade games, shopping carts, vending machines, etc.), are just a few activities of this subspecies.

Weapons of choice include: Butterfly knives and Chinese throwing stars.

* VERY similar to the Hesher Mullet.

Hunted by the Chelmo brothas



A rare breed of Mullet. Men of few words. Hard to hunt. Easy to love. Available for so many "Of da ladies!" (yet so hard for only one woman to satisfy). MM's Been around since the 70's and was a Mullet before Mullet was Mullet. Not even late-middle-age can cool the fire burning within this elusive Mull. With a smooth singing voice, this lady-magnet appears 4 nights a week at the Holiday Inn lounge just outside Phoenix, Arizona. Wanna hear "Hey Nineteen" again? How 'bout "Black Water" by the Doobies? Not an issue, darlin', not an issue at all. He's easy. Yeah. Easy like Sunday mornin'. Michael MacDonullet doesn't move too fast, Sugar. He's built for comfort, not built for speed. We were lucky to catch him on the move at the grocery store. No time for that shallow picture stuff, babe.

* Note the white, satin MEMBERS ONLY jacket AND the well articulated Mullestache. MM's got style; Miles and miles.

Hunted by Adam Smith, written by Josh B.  


Sports Mullet

This clean, well groomed mullet is rather high up on the food chain. A decent paying job, probably as a "contractor" or other construction related worker gives this mullet money to burn on all sports related hobbies, except of course actual participation. No sir, this mullets days of athletic fame (or more likely shame) are long passed. Of course the "bum" or "blown" knee kept him from playing football at college. Probable hunting grounds are Nascar themed sportsbars, sports card shows, or Off Track Betting locations. With ice cold beer (the good stuff; PBR, or the Silver Bullet) this mull loves nothing more than screaming loudly at the TV. If his loud, incessant banter doesn't tell you his favorite team, his jersey (customized with nickname of course), "team" jacket, and Zubazz pants sure will. Once he starts taking about his "varsity" days on the gridiron you can bet on long and greatly exaggerated tales of athletic prowess. Don't be fooled by the reasonably clean look of this mull...hunting can be dangerous. Mulletude flows strong from memories of high school football and beating up "nerds".
Hunted by Danny B. Written by Dan Cummings  


Officer Mull


We see a RARE example of a mullet moving/infiltrating his way through the system to the fearless world of Law enforcement.

B4 U freak out and say, 'No, not a mullet protecting and serving ME!" Understand they can use their inherent temper/anger in a positive way(kicking the shit out of criminals). Congratulations mullet.

* Would have NEVER made the cut without the mullestache

hunted by azsr22  


Drifter Mull


"During the summer I hit the open road in my cluttered rusty brown pinto. I generally stick to national parks(Yosemite, Arches, etc.) I don't really go hiking or anything physical like that at the parks. Instead, I usually hang out in my car and listen to classical music(or Phil Collins) on my A M radio while playing with my rubber band ball. I've got a pretty good collection goin' now, not to mention 2 rubber band guns! Once in a while, when I pretend like I want to end everything, I hold the rubber band gun up to my forehead and pretend like i'm going to shoot. This would explain my wandering eye....I don't want to talk about it OK! Jus go away!"

hunted by Danny B


Studio Mullsician


When I was a kid I remember being really freaked out by the guys in the organ stores at the mall. They would play these ridiculous songs with big fake plastic smiles and animated body language. To my best recollection THIS is what they looked like. I could be wrong, I mean it was a fairly traumatic experience so bear with me. I don't believe there are too many of these stores still around which is a good thing for us but not for the professional mull-organ-cheeseball. It is believed they migrated to the fulfilling life of a studio musician. Band's that are formulated by record companies to Produce 'hit's'. Sad part is they probably got more attention from SUV moms and snotty kids back in the organ selling mall days.

Hunted by Rob


Struggler Mullet


Years of hard alcohol, hookers, and the street life in general can take it's toll on the mullet. Notice the defeated stance here. His weak, flailing limbs are being propped up by a dirty trash can. It's been a tough & lonely road for this mull...but really, he's only got himself to blame.

One positive thing we can say for this species is that they are dedicated to the preservation of their mullet. Almost always, they've had their mull since way back when(most likely, around '81) and they've never looked back. They shun newer mulletheads (i.e. "Slater"--Saved by the Bell circa '89)

Hunted by the "Mullet Crew"


'I am the mull'


Every once in while a truly great mull comes along like this. It IS a 'Diamond in the ruff', every detail is completely intentional and accounted for. Look at the aero-dynamacy, the colors, the length of this mull. A true craftsman. Now check out the accessories; The 44oz. Big Gulp, the wife beater, the beaded necklace, the aviator sunglasses and finally the baseball hat attached to the belt loop of faded denim shorts. The attitude, the confidence in his stride are also key, undeniable elements that make this mull stand above the rest. 'I - AM - THE - MAN' emanates from within and is projected to all. Good luck dude.

Hunted by Christine





A truly rare subspecies of mullet, the Octopullet briefly surfaces from the ocean to attend a monster truck show on land(in San Diego). In general, the Octopullet is a fairly timid and harmless creature. However, if crossed or when sensing danger The Octopullet can be DEADLY. The mullet has mutaded throughout time to actually form sharp tenticles which are poisoness and deadly. They are extreemly loyal and will defend his cousins, The Monster Truck Mullet, The No Fear Bad/Boy Club Mullet and The Pimply-Ass Whale Mullet untill the end.

  Hunted by Doowan


hunted by doowan MacGonaughill
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